So, you like food. You also like people, sometimes. You should put them together in a formal setting, right? Wrong. Here are all the things, good and bad and very bad, that will happen when you try to get your Barefoot Contessa on. You’ve been warned.
1. You decide you want to have friends over for dinner. Congratulations.
2. First, pick a theme that lets your guests know what they’re getting into.
3. Invite some of your closest pals.
4. It’s time to get this bitch started.
5. You gotta figure out the menu.
6. You might need the help of a friend.
7. Make sure to taste each dish along the way.
8. It might need a little something special.
9. Feel free to take a short nap before your guests arrive. You deserve it.
10. When they get there, remember to act natural.
11. Be humble when they compliment your culinary genius.
12. Expect one of your friends to announce that they’ve recently become vegan and can’t eat anything you’ve cooked.
13. That’s cool.
14. What’s that burning smell? Oh, wait, that was dinner.
15. Plan B — grilled cheese — in effect.
16. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy your bounty.